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65 POWER UNCOMMON Chris Wanstrath LV 18 ยท NECROMANCER OF LEGACY CODE @defunkt 90 STR 30 DEX 76 CON 84 INT 31 WIS 71 CHA CHAOTIC COMMITTER git.findutils.com/defunkt

Chris Wanstrath

LV 18 ยท NECROMANCER OF LEGACY CODE ยท 65 POWER

Level 18 Necromancer of Legacy Code โ€” rolled live from the public record. Alignment: Chaotic Committer.

RUBY 18 seasons pro @defunkt ↗

Universe

โšฝ FootballThe auction house โ€” four stadium designs ๐ŸŽฒ RPGCharacter sheet โ€” class, level, alignment ๐Ÿ—‚ DossierClassified file โ€” codename, threat level

Sheet design

ArcaneViolet ink, rune light GrimoireOld parchment, brass fittings CelestialStar charts, cold blue

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Save

Type-of-dev card Half-time report

Embed in your README

[![@defunkt's GitHub Dev Card](https://git.findutils.com/defunkt.svg?card=rpg)](https://git.findutils.com/defunkt?card=rpg)
<iframe src="https://git.findutils.com/defunkt/embed?card=rpg" width="340" height="520" style="border:0" title="@defunkt's GitHub Dev Card" loading="lazy"></iframe>

Markdown for your README, iframe for your personal site โ€” the card stays live either way.

What do these numbers mean?
  • OVR /99 โ€” the overall rating: all six stats blended on a curve where 99 is deliberately unreachable. Even the legends top out in the mid-nineties.
  • PAC Pace โ€” how often this profile ships (public events per week, ~90-day window).
  • SHO Shooting โ€” stars earned on original repos. Impact, not volume.
  • PAS Passing โ€” pull-request activity plus follower reach. How much the work connects.
  • DRI Dribbling โ€” language range across repos, with a bonus for balance.
  • DEF Defense โ€” how much of their own work is still maintained six months on.
  • PHY Physical โ€” seasons on GitHub plus consistency inside the window.
  • TIERS โ€” Bronze to 59 · Silver from 60 · Gold from 75 · Holo from 87. Earned from the rating, never bought โ€” every card design keeps the true tier.
  • DATA โ€” public profile, public repos, and ~90 days of public events, read live. Private work is invisible to the scouts, so private-repo heroes rate lower than they deserve. It's a vibe check, not a performance review.
II

The Campaign

the questline, straight from the public record

๐Ÿ“œ Quest log

The campaign, quest by quest โ€” from the public record.

  • Season 7rolled a new character โ€” joined GitHub
  • Season 8embarked on facebox ยท loot ⭐1.9k
  • Season 8embarked on gist ยท loot ⭐3.8k
  • Season 11embarked on dotjs ยท loot ⭐3.1k
  • Season 11embarked on jquery-pjax ยท loot ⭐16.6k

โš”๏ธ Loot earned

Artifacts recovered โ€” most-starred public repos, live links.

jquery-pjax

pushState + ajax = pjax

⭐ 16.6kJavaScript gist

Potentially the best command line gister.

⭐ 3.8kRuby dotjs

~/.js

⭐ 3.1kRuby facebox

Facebook-style lightbox, built in jQuery

⭐ 1.9kJavaScript unicorn

Unofficial Unicorn Mirror.

⭐ 1.5kRuby pystache

Mustache in Python

⭐ 1.3kPython

๐Ÿ›ก๏ธ Party comparison

Each attribute against the legends party average (brass tick) โ€” this is the legends party, not all of GitHub.

DEX ยท shipping speed-34 vs party
STR ยท star power+3 vs party
CHA ยท reach-9 vs party
INT ยท range+14 vs party
WIS ยท upkeep-16 vs party
CON ยท endurance-9 vs party
III

The Readings

nine divinations on one adventurer
36.9kstars earned
22.7kfollowers
71own repos
18.7years on github
0.0events / week
1%still maintained

🔥 The roast

Observations your profile earned. All of it is public record โ€” zero AI.

  • 🔥🔥🔥Public activity in the last 90 days: basically none. Your GitHub profile has the energy of an out-of-office reply.
  • 🔥🔥🔥Your most popular repo (jquery-pjax, 16648 stars) hasn't been touched in over a year. 1930 people forked it. They're waiting. Still waiting.
  • 🔥🔥70 of your 71 repos haven't been touched in over a year. You don't have side projects, you have a museum.

Every line is computed live from public GitHub data โ€” nothing is written or stored about anyone. If you'd rather your handle not appear in our example lists, tell @codewitholgun and it comes off.

🧬 Developer archetype

Detected from when, what, and how you ship.

๐Ÿ‘ป

The Ghost

Seen everything. Committed nothing.

Barely any public activity in the last 90 days. Either deep in private repos or deep in thought โ€” the public record refuses to say.

โญ The Baller๐Ÿ—บ๏ธ The Polyglot

🧪 Language DNA

What the public repos are made of.

Ruby59% ยท 32 repos
JavaScript13% ยท 7 repos
Emacs Lisp13% ยท 7 repos
Python6% ยท 3 repos
CoffeeScript4% ยท 2 repos
HTML2% ยท 1 repo
C2% ยท 1 repo
Io2% ยท 1 repo

👯 Dev twin & nemesis

Closest and furthest stat vectors in the legends pool. The tape doesn't lie.

YOUR TWIN · 99% match @brendangregg both know a repo graveyard when they see one, both pick their moments
YOUR NEMESIS · 55% match @matz ships every single week โ€” no excuses
Settle it: battle your nemesis

Twin math: normalized distance across all six stats, against the 39-legend pool.

🧭 Dev alignment

Where the shipping style lands on the eternal grid. Computed, not chosen.

Lawful Merger
Neutral Shipper
Chaotic Force-Pusher
Lawful Committer
True Neutral Committer
Chaotic Committer
Lawful Archivist
Neutral Lurker
Chaotic Abandoner

Chaotic Committer โ€” โ€œwipโ€, โ€œfixโ€, โ€œfinal-final-2โ€ โ€” and somehow it works.

๐Ÿ”ฎ Oracle report

The reading โ€” what a guild recruiter would circle on this sheet.

90
Work people starstars earned on original repos
84
Range across stacksbreadth and balance of languages
🔴 Needs preseason Quiet on the public pitch lately โ€” private-repo minutes don’t show here.

Play style: ๐Ÿ‘ป The Ghost โ€” Seen everything. Committed nothing.

9Languages
18Seasons
22.7kFollowers
1%Squad upkeep

✨ Scouting developers like @defunkt for your team? A hiring platform built on real GitHub signal is coming to FindUtils.

๐Ÿ’ฐ Bounty

POSTED โ€” the reward the guilds put on this adventurer.

โ‚ฌ11M
Signs forOlympique Linterre
Release clauseโ‚ฌ16M
Contract3 seasons
Weekly wageโ‚ฌ102K
PositionRUBY
Age18 seasons pro

Scouting report โ€” fee adjustments

Injury-prone (90-day silence)-15%
Shirt sales (1k+ followers reach)+10%
Veteran leadership (8+ seasons)+8%
Squad depth (polyglot)+6%

Scout’s notes โ€” what would raise the fee

+10% Rust premium the day Rust shows up in the repos
+12% current-form bonus at 20 events/week (now 0.0)
+7% for a high maintenance record โ€” keep 70% of repos alive

Comparable transfers, season 26

P. O'Callback→ Borussia Dotfilesโ‚ฌ11M
A. Lambda→ Sporting Segfaultโ‚ฌ9.4M
M. Refactoroviฤ‡→ Git City FCโ‚ฌ9.8M

Transfer fees are football fiction computed from public GitHub signal โ€” the underlying numbers (stars, activity, maintenance, reach) are real.

โš”๏ธ Duel

Pick an opponent. Same attributes, same rules, one victor โ€” the duel gets its own shareable page.

🎖️ Medal cabinet

5 of 10 unlocked โ€” every sigil is earned from public signal, none are for sale.

๐Ÿ… Century Club 36,874 stars on original work
๐Ÿงฒ Talisman 22,721 followers show up for this profile
๐Ÿ—ฃ Polyglot 9 languages in the public repos
๐Ÿ”’ Night Owl 40% of your public activity between 22:00 and 06:00
๐Ÿ”’ Iron Man Keep 80% of 5+ own repos alive
๐ŸŽ– Veteran 18 seasons in the game
๐Ÿ”’ Wonderkid 10+ events/week inside your first two seasons
๐ŸŽฏ Sharpshooter SHO 90 โ€” the stars keep coming
๐Ÿ”’ The Engine Rate 85+ Pace (shipping cadence)
๐Ÿ”’ The Wall Rate 85+ Defense (maintenance)
IV

The Party Invite

for guilds seeking members
“๐Ÿ””
🧪 Ruby ยท JavaScript ยท Emacs Lisp 📅 18 seasons on GitHub ⚙️ 1% of repos maintained

โ— Open to new campaigns โ€” reach Chris Wanstrath via the GitHub profile.

GitHub profile → Print dossier

Everything above derives from the public GitHub record โ€” no résumé inflation possible.

Want the pack-rip animation, local-timezone commit clock, and a battle picker with live search? Everything here also lives in the full interactive tool →